…So This is Christmas….
A Star Blazers Christmas Tale of
Christmas in the Year 2207
By: Fred & Gail Kopetz (A Companion
Story to The New Comet)
Star Blazers is © 2008
by Voyager International, all rights reserved, this project is for fun, please
don’t sue me. J
With
Apologies to Charles Dickens, Ebenezer Scrooge, and Jacob Marley’s Ghost.
Part Two of Two: General Stone’s Visions
and Santa “Appears” at the Wildstars…
I. The Spirit of
Christmas Future…(??)
Earth:
Somewhere weird…
December 25, 2207:
0300 Hours
When we last left General Stone in his strange dream, he was utterly convinced that he had been visited by the ghosts of Captain Avatar, Trelaina of Telezart, and Prince Zordar, doing some weird 23rd Century version of A Christmas Carol wherein Stone is being dragged towards reformation by his ugly moustache.
Now, Stone found himself (in his dream ??) kneeling in the cold in his nightshirt as a dreadful sounding bell on some clock tower chimed Three AM.
Stone then felt himself being kicked in the face by some heavy, booted foot.
Before he could protest, the heavy boot kicked him in the head, and a deep, cold voice roared, “KNEEL BEFORE ME, YOU SCUM!”
“Wait,”
gasped Stone. “In A Christmas Carol, the
Ghost of Christmas yet-to-be never talks! Who the hell are you?”
“Your true Lord and Master!” hissed the horrible Being in a black cloak that extended a skeletal hand towards Stone. “You and Yvona were under my power all the time, you Idiot!”
Then, the Creature threw back his head and laughed like mad, revealing a face that was just a Skull with burning greenish eyes. “I am Ekogaru the Great, and I am Eternal! I have been forced to come here to torment you with visions of Christmas yet to be. This is in hopes that you reform. I hope you do NOT! I personally could not give a crap whether you reform or not, scum, because I like you THE WAY YOU ARE! And as for Me, you will make a Great Slave when I recover my power as your God!”
“Oh, shit, get me out of here,” Stone wailed as he tried to crawl away from this Monster that felt like Death.
“SILENCE, Mortal piece of dirt!” roared the Dark Lord.
“I’d rather have a Shinigami around than you,” said Stone. “Prince Zordar! Come back! Save me from this monstrosity!”
“He is back in Hell,” whispered Ekogaru. “They let him up every now and again to torment people as part of his Penance. Or maybe he is not dead at all but being tormented alive in a Dimensional Prison Realm Trelaina sent him to? I do not know, and I could damn well care less. Trelaina is a weird, freaky creature that I have no truck with. But, you, I enjoy tormenting you. Grab my cloak!”
“WHY?”
“GRAB IT, SCUM!”
Stone was forced to grab the Dark Lord’s cloak as he was whisked off….
…to a dark room that stank with formadelhyde in what seemed to be a mortuary somehwhere in the city.
The room had a gurney in the middle, covered with a sheet.
On the gurney, under a sheet, lay a body.
It was dead.
“Who is that?” said Stone.
“That idiot might die tonight,” said Ekogaru. “Maybe he will. Maybe he won’t,” said Ekogaru as Stone began to feel chest pains. “Let me take you to an office in this funeral home. You might like to hear what you are about to hear!”
Stone found himself in the office.
A nasty old man with a beard was laughing as the funeral director, in a black suit, handed him a bag.
“Wot’s this rot?” he said in a weird, evil Cockney British accent.
“We found this around the latest stiff we brought here. The wife was laughing her head off when she found him, would you believe it? This guy was looking at all this crap when he died, and I’d like to sell it off…”
“A Brass EDF General Officer’s pin?” said the nasty old man. “Was this rotter in the military?”
“He was,” said the Funeral Director. “He’s not now!” he laughed as Stone shivered.
“Why, Lordship,” he whispered to Ekogaru. “That looks just like my…”
Ekogaru made him shut up by hitting him in the back of his head.
“And this is a picture of a Battle Satellite goin’ off at some battlewagon?” said the old Cockney.
“Looks like the famous Argo, doesn’t it?” said the Funeral Director. “Something from around the time of the Comet Empire; the first war. Most people forgot this. We found the old fart clutching this in his dead hand! We think he conked off when his ticker went! Too bad, these heart attacks, especially on Christmas Eve…”
Both men were laughing evilly as the Funeral Director held up a Rolex Cosmo Watch. “Nice 2200 model, with all the dials and stuff on it,” said the Funeral Director. “Wifey said I could sell it to you, Sutcliffe?”
The old man looked at the watch, which Stone recognized as his own…or just like it. “Finish is nicked up and the second hand is runnin’ bloody weird,” said Sutcliffe. “I’ll offer yer forty quid for the whole lot…”
“Just forty credits?” gasped the Funeral Director.
“I’m bein’ generous, luv, it’s Christmas!” laughed Sutcliffe.
Stone shivered as his most treasured possessions were thus sold to this old, nasty pawnbroker for just forty credits. The Funeral Director and Pawnbroker laughed as they opened up a bottle of Rum and began to get drunk together while singing a boozy round of a song called, “We’re Despicable!”
“Please, Spirit,” said Stone. “Take me out of here. This place is weird! Is there any happiness or depth of feeling connected with the death of this man?”
Ekogaru clapped his skeletal hands with a click and Stone was escorted away….
He found himself standing in the Wildstars’ house, watching as people had a party and Nova sat in a beautiful black and white dress behind a piano playing Christmas Carols and singing.
A phone rang. A boy that Stone recognized as the Wildstars’ adopted son, Jonathan got up and answered it. Over the revellers and Nova’s playing “Holly Jolly Christmas” on the piano as Derek watched, Jonathan said a few things and nodded. He ran over to his mother and whispered in her ear and she stopped playing.
Nova smiled and began to play the first notes of the EDF Anthem, turning it into the Star Force’s march as she played a bit and then stopped and said, “Ladies and Gentlemen, I have some sad but momentous news. A member of the Defense General Staff just died in his bed last night. It was a heart attack. A real tragedy.”
“General Stone?” said Eager in a loud voice.
Nova nodded sheepishly as Wendy clapped her hands and laughed. “Great! He’ll never torment me again or make me come into the office on Christmas Eve! Let’s drink a toast to hope he’s really dead!”
“Oh, God, Spirit!” mumbled Stone. “They hate me! They truly hate me!”
The Commander said, “I won’t join in this toast, Wendy, but
I share your sentiment.
“Who are we gonna replace him with?” said Eager.
“Derek, maybe,” said Wendy as she hugged Commodore Wildstar.
“I don’t want a desk job!” said Derek.
“Why?” Nova said. “It would be a promotion.”
“I don’t want to sit behind a desk all my life; I like my ship too much,” Derek said. “I also do not want to grow a grey mustache and turn mean like Stone did. Maybe he was frustrated because he lost the only ship he had years ago when the Gamilons shot it out from under him. What a loser!”
“Maybe he was sick, the poor man,” Nova said.
“Maybe he was just mean and nasty,” said Mark Venture.
“Maybe he had killer hemmorhoids,” laughed Homer.
“Maybe ‘e couldn’t get no sex from ‘is wife?” said Bryan Hartcliffe. “Let’s propose a toast to ‘ope he goes to Hell!”
“Please take me out of here,” sobbed Stone. “It is evident no one loves me and I have to change. They loathe me. They just loathe me!”
“Nova and Wildstar are the only ones who feel sorry for you,” said Ekogaru. “Sort of. Like that? Your enemies might be the only one to shed tears when you die. If they even do that. I’m tempted to let you stay here as a Ghost and make sure you die. You can float around here until you get sucked into Hell. Like that?”
“Have mercy, Spirit,” said Stone.
Ekogaru laughed and kicked Stone in the face as he grovelled.
Stone found himself kneeling, almost naked, in the snowy ground at Heroes’ Hill.
Many of the portraits were covered with snow. The cobblestones looked very fresh near one spot.
Lightning flared as Stone began to brush the snow off a memorial portrait and its stone.
Finally, Stone gasped as he noticed the carved face; it was his own. The inscription below it read: GENERAL E. JACKSON STONE. 2157-2207. DEVOTED OFFICER. RESPECTED BY ALL; MISSED BY FEW.
“Spirit!” said Stone. “Are these shadows of things that will be?”
“Maybe,” said Ekogaru.
“Or shadows of things that may be?”
“Maybe,” said Ekogaru. “Nothing is set in stone, yet, pardon the bad pun. You have a touch of ventral fibrillation in your heart, if you have one, back in your body in your home. You might die soon. It is up to you. Is this what you want?”
“no,” said Stone.
“If so, do nothing, You will soon die, and like you recently said, ‘reduce the surplus population,’ and then I can help them torment you forever in the Pit. If that is not what you wish, change. Reform. Revise.”
“If not?”
“Up to you,” said Ekogaru as he vanished. “I could bloody care less about what happens to you, scum…”
“NO, SPIRIT!” said Stone. “Don’t leave me here! Don’t leave me here, please, it’s cold, it’s so cold, it’s…”
Stone lay on the ground and wept.
Stone came to kneeling in his living room in his rumpled clothes. There was no clock; it was snowing outside, and his wristwatch, which he still had on, said it was 0400 Hours on December 25th.
“It’s Christmas,” he said as he sat up and looked at the spilled remnants of his hot toddy. “I made it, I lived, I lived, I made it. I don’t know what you were, Spirits, but thank you.”
If he had chosen death, she would have heard his dead body
falling to the floor and found him dead. Instead, he was alive. He crawled over
to his wife’s bare feet and kissed them, making her laugh. “
“Goose?” said Chelsea Stone, who was a severe-looking redheaded woman about Jack’s age. “Is this some movie? No one can get a goose these days. We can get a turkey or a ham…”
“Good..we get a turkey, and we give it to the Wildstars!” laughed Stone. “And we need money; open my safe and get out two thousand credits. Why, we have to save Derek’s child, Tiny Tim!”
“Tiny Tim?” said
“Well, we have to keep Christmas!” yelled Stone. “God Bless us, everyone!”
“Are you sure you are feeling all right, Jack?” said
“Let’s go!” laughed General Stone as he twirled his wife around. “We have no time to spare!”
“Okay,” she said….
II. Christmas Day (1)
Earth:
St. Luke’s Cathedral
December 25, 2207: 0930
Hours
The Wildstars, the Ventures, Nova’s parents, and Deke and
Sasha stood behind a pew in the Cathedral, singing “Hark the Herald Angels Sing!” between Scripture readings in this
Nova held hands with Derek as she sang and held her daughter in her arms, smiling as she stood there in the black and white knee-length dress she wore with black strappy sandals and a spig of holly in her hair. When they were done, she kissed Derek, handed Ariel to her mother, and left the pew, going up front as the priest introduced her.
After the proper Alleluias were sung, Nova bowed before the book of the Gospel and said, “A reading from the Gospel of Luke…”
After the congregation said “Glory unto the Lord,” Nova
cleared her throat and began to read: “From the Gospel of Luke, Chapter Two. The
tale says: And it came to pass in those days, that there
went out a decree from Caesar Augustus that all the
world should be taxed. (And this taxing was first made when Cyrenius was
governor of
Derek smiled at Nova as she paused and then looked down at the
large red Bible and continued to read, “And
so it was, that, while they were there, the days were accomplished that she
should be delivered. And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him
in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for
them in the inn. And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the
field, keeping watch over their flock by night. And, lo, the angel of the Lord
came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were
sore afraid. And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you
good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you is born this day in the city of
The congregation made the sign of the cross as Nova closed the
book, and went back to her pew to continue the
Later, at Derek and Nova’s house, Foxy and Katrina laughed and kissed under the mistletoe as Nova played and sang, “Run, Run, Rudolph” at her piano in the living room while even Wendy and Homer came over and danced, smiling at a properly lit menorah on the Wildstars’ mantel in respect of their faith. Most of the house was decorated like Christmas, of course, as Nova’s mother Teri held baby Alex and helped the little suit-clad baby “dance” to the music as he laughed and giggled at his sister Ariel, who was crawling around in the used wrapping paper.
It was snowing again outside, clearly visible since it was just about 1PM.
“I wonder where General Stone is?” Wendy said absently as she stood there in the white dress and sandals she had worn here.
“I don’t know,” said Homer. “I don’t think the nasty old walrus celebrates Christmas.”
“Nova did not invite him,” said Diane Henson as she walked over holding Sandor’s hand. Not far away, Commander Dash was laughing with Jefferson Hardy as the two of them watched a pregnant Angie Hartcliffe happily playing peek-a-boo with Nova’s little sister Aurora Forrester while her brother David sat with Jonathan playing with the trains; there was another loop of track under the tree now, and a new train, a copy of an old Japan Railways C62 Hudson Type, chugged along with its whistle blowing as it blew smoke and raced the Rio Grande diesel around the tree. “Even if she had, he would not have come…”
“Where’s
“Bryan Hartcliffe?” asked Jere “Brewski” Marrable as he sat on the floor snuggling with his new fiancee’ Gabrielle “Bangs” Capistrano. “He got paroled from jail after his Court-Martial for assaulting Angie and they sorta made up, him and Angie. He’s coming by later on.”
“Yeah, and that sucks,” said Kitano as he stood nearby playing with one of Nova’s gifts to Derek, an old-style pinball machine. He was playing pinball with Domon, and so far, Domon was losing. “I think I’d rather have Stone here than Hartcliffe.”
“I’d rather have Hartcliffe,” said Captain Mark Venture as he stood there holding hands with his wife Holly (as per her name, she had on a whole headband made of holly).
Nova stopped playing the piano, and she put on a music capsule of “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree” as she danced with Derek, who looked handsome in his EDF blues and peacoat.
They laughed, and Katrina winked and shoved them under the mistletoe, where they had to stop dancing and start kissing, to everyone’s applause.
A moment later, the front door opened, and Bryan Hartcliffe, who now had a beard, came in with his hair and beard dyed white as he wore a Santa suit and yelled, “Merry bleedin’ Christmas, everyone! MERRY BLEEDIN’ CHRISTMAS! HO HO HO HO!”
“It’s Santa!” yelled little
“Derek, let me get that,” said Nova as she kissed Derek and ran off in her sandals (which she kept on in the house since it was a party). “Probably a late arrival, maybe Cory Conroy got stuck in the snow….”
“Yeah,” said Derek as he leaned against the pinball machine.
Nova, with her gift from Derek (a new diamond love knot ring) glittering on her finger, ran up and opened the door….
…to be greeted by a second Santa, with a fake beard, Santa suit, grey mustache, and big bag.
“Excuse me?” Nova said. “We have a Santa already.”
“Two Santas, Mom?” said a confused Jonathan as he ran up in his suit.
“No, this one is…General Stone?” said Nova. “Sir, this is a surprise!”
“God bless us, everyone!” he yelled. “I am sorry I was mean
to you and Mrs. Glitchman yesterday, Nova! I have a turkey for you. A
“
“And money!” he said as he stuffed a red envelope into Nova’s cleavage. “MONEY!”
“Money?” said Nova as she blushed and pulled the envelope from her dress. “Derek!” she cried as she opened the envelope. “General Stone just gave us a thousand credits!”
“Why?” said Derek.
“Because it is Christmas and I am alive!” he said. “And give this to Wendy!” he said as he gave Wendy another envelope. “I am so happy, I’m crazy!”
“Sure you’re all right, sir?” said Wendy as she took her envelope and opened it; and also found a thousand credits.
“This, this is…” said Wendy.
“Christmas,” said Stone. “It’s Christmas! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!”
Later
on, Derek and Nova were all alone, hugging and kissing under the Christmas Tree as the guests left. Bryan Hartcliffe had played Santa,
drank too much punch, got very drunk, got into a fistfight with General Stone,
and both villains got thrown out of the Wildstar house on their ears.
Alex and Ariel were asleep as Nova said, “I’m so happy it’s Christmas, Derek. I love you so much.”
“Me too, Nova,” said Derek. “You remember what tomorrow is, right?”
“Yes, our sixth anniversary,” she whispered. “And we have three beautiful children to celebrate it with. But I’d rather celebrate with you. Tonight. After midnight.”
“How would you like to celebrate?” Derek whispered.
Nova went into his arms as they kissed. “Does that answer your question?”
“I love you,” said Derek.
“I love you, too,” said Nova. “Merry Christmas, my Derek.”
“Merry Christmas, Nova.”
END.