Laughs of the present, pain of the past
By Yuki Wildstar
6th of January, 2225
Outskirts of Planet Gardiana
EDF Battleship Argo
Quarters of Nova Wildstar
She didn’t want to see him and felt safer back on the Argo. Alex sat on the bed as he watched his mother tuck Miku in.
“Mom, is she alright?” He asked her.
“She’s just fine honey. Lucky for her she slept right through it all. Why don’t you go check on your brothers and get some rest. I’m okay, just tired right now. We’ll talk in the morning and Alex?”
“I don’t want to bring up a word to her about what happen, alright?”
Giving her half a smile he said. “Okay.” He gently kissed his mother on the forehead and left her room. He quickly checked on his brothers and found them sleeping silently in bed, finally both were able to sleep knowing that their sister was back. He then made his way to his father quarters and waited until he came back from the planet.
They walked into the castle and Mariposa’s aides ran to take hold of her. “She needs rest. Please make sure that she does.” Wildstar ordered. “Desslok, Devina,”
Devina stood in front of him and said. “Mariposa is going through a lot right now. Her mind wants to be the queen and perform her duties. But her heart wants to be free to love. All her life she was kept from her true self. She was told to rule a world. Love was not an option. When she met Flash she had to turn away love because of her duties. You were the only connection to him. So in her mind you were him. She was willing to let you go once the baby was born but then she lost it. Losing a child is something to hard to bear, especially when you want it so bad. Derek, it is not my place to say anything about what happen. But it pains me that you would put Nova through this.” Derek looked away in shame. Never did he want her or Desslok to know about his private life. She placed her hand on his face and brought it up to see her. “Give her time. She will come around. Let her be for now. Addressing this now will only make things worse. Namir will be here in the morning and he will see to it that she gets help. Julie will indeed be a great friend to her.”
Taking a huge sigh he held back his tears not wanting Desslok to see him cry. “Thank you. I should get back to the ship. Desslok,” he swallowed hard.
“Go Wildstar. I will deal with things here.” He said as he patted him on the back. Leaning in closer he lowered his voice to Wildstar. “Everything will work out.”
Wildstar quickly left and thought about what Devina said. He wanted so much to talk about it to Nova but was Devina right should he wait until she is calmer? In his mind he played it out over and over again. Walking onto the Argo he made his way to her quarters. Ready to knock on her door, he stopped and walked away. Making his way back to his own quarters he walked in and was shocked to see Alex sitting there waiting. Quickly he got up and walked over to his father. Wildstar stood taller preparing for what his son would do. Did his mother tell him everything? Did they both blame him? Would he take another swing at him? He held his breath and was ready for his son to scold him on making his mother cry. “How are you dad?”
He blinked his eyes rapidly and then smiling slightly. He could see the concern in his face. “I’m fine, how is your mother?”
“No there’s nothing to say right now. It’s best that I keep my distance. Give her time to think and calm down. If I go see her now she and I will only fight. When she is ready she will let me know. I just need for you to keep an eye on her for me. Can you do that?” Nodding his head Alex said yes. “Good, now go get some rest. We will be leaving in a day or two. I still have to straighten something’s out here. Goodnight Alex.” He said to his oldest. “Oh and Alex?”
“Thank you for not making a big deal out of all of this. Even though it is, you managed to keep calm.” He stared closer at him and smiled. “I can’t believe how much you are growing up. Part of that is my fault that you had to take on being a grown up. I love you, please remember that.”
He gave his father a smile and nodded his head. “No problem dad. See you in the morning. Goodnight.”
7th of January, 2225
They watched as the Saku landed. Wildstar was itching to get it over with. The sooner he takes control the sooner I can get on with my life with Nova. She deserves better. I only wished I knew this was all a set up. When they called me to planet Zazba I should have known. I just want to go. He thought to himself. The hatch opened and Namir and Julie quickly exited the ship. “Captain Wildstar, Emperor Desslok. How is she?” Namir asked.
“They managed to keep her sedated. I’m grateful that you could come. She really needs someone she can trust right now. Julie, can we speak privately?” Wildstar said. Nodding her head they walked past them and down the walk way. “I don’t know how I can ever repay you and Namir for this. I’m walking on egg shells around Nova. Julie can you do me a favor and look over her??. She really isn’t taking this well. After all this time I thought she moved on with her life. I guess it was harder on her than I thought. Nova finally made peace with it all and now this. Julie,”
“Derek, no need to explain we both have done things that we are not proud of. I will make sure she gets the necessary help. How is Nova?”
“I haven’t spoken to her since we found them. And I don’t expect to talk with her for a while. She needs her space and time to think. If I try now she’ll only go on the defensive and tell me to leave. It’s just best to stay out of her way.” Derek took a deep breath feeling drained from everything. “Julie, I, I, don’t even know how to look Desslok and Namir in the face. My personal life seems to be taking over my duties. How am I going to deal with them?” he said looking in the direction of Namir and Desslok.
“Oh Derek, don’t worry about them. I’m sure that they understand. We all made mistakes, we are all not perfect. Though Desslok may not admit it I’m sure there are one or two things in his life that he regrets. Looks like we should go, Namir and Desslok are getting antsy over there.” She smiled at him. Pulling at his arm she leaned in and whispered. “Do you want me to talk with Nova?”
“No, we will work it out.” They looked in on Mariposa and
decide best that she would stay with Julie and Namir on Bolar. Wildstar was
relieved that she was in good hands now even with his anger he had to admit he
felt sorry for her. It was easy for him to walk away but he really never
thought how she was going through it. He was ready to leave when Julie told him
that she w
“Derek I’m so sorry. I just wanted,”
“Please your highness you don’t have to apologize to me. I never knew how much you were hurting. I’m sorry.”
“I only wish I can change time and never put you and Nova through that. I will be alright. Go to her.”
“I can stay with you. You,”
“No go to her. Nova and your family need you and they are your life. Now go.” She said pushing him away from her.
“Are you sure? I can stay if you like.”
“Now how will that look to her? She loves you and needs you. Go Derek.” Looking away he sighed and walked out never seeing her break down and cried for him and their daughter. He bid them all goodbye and thanked Desslok and Devina for their help.
“I don’t know how I am ever going to repay you. Thank you.”
“It was Devina that wanted to help.” Desslok said as he held his wife close to him. “Anyway I would never let anything happened to my god daughter. She is too innocent for me to let anything harm her. Plus Aurora and Devina would never forgive me if I didn’t do anything to help. Good luck Wildstar I hope that it all works out for you and Nova.”
“Aye, aye captain.” They all called out. Alex sat at his station and watched his father turned his focus to his duties wondering what happened with the queen. “WILDSTAR!” he heard his father yelled to him. “GET TO WORK!”
“Yes sir.” Alex called back and then turned to his station.
“We’ve been delayed long enough. It’s time to go home.” He said with relief.
16th of January, 2225
EDF Battleship Argo
For days he knew she avoided being near him. Alex’s took it upon himself to bring his sister for their father to say good night to her. He tried talking to his mother into speaking with his father but she simply shrugged him away. Dinner was divided between their parents. Every other night their children would have dinner with one or the other. When DJ asked why one was not there they would both say their schedules wouldn’t permit them to have dinner as a family. Alex knew differently he knew that his mother didn’t want to be in the same room with their father. “Goodnight Miku, remember I love you. We will be home soon and you’ll get to play outside finally. Thank you Alex for bringing her here.”
“You know dad, mom kinda takes a walk on the observation deck when I bring her to you. Sometimes even at night when everyone is sleeping. I think she’s having a rough time sleeping.” Alex said in a nonchalant way. “I tried to ask her if she is alright but you know mom she never wants to be a Debbie downer.” His father sat on his bed and smiled at his son. How he was trying to make piece within the family. “Well Miku its time for bed, mom is probably waiting for us. We should go. Good night dad. See you in the morning.” Wildstar looked out into the dark sky and wonder what his son was getting at. His mother walking the ship’s deck at night is something he didn’t like to hear about. He tried to keep busy by catching up on reports something he couldn’t concentrate on much. He walked down to the bridge and checked on the night crew and captain.
“No, no nothing. Just can’t sleep. I see that you have everything under control here. I’ll leave you to your work. Good night Captain.”
“Good night sir.”
Wildstar made his way to the mess hall and grabbed some coffee. Like I need coffee this time of the night he thought. Looking at the cup in his hand he tossed it into the trash and walked out. ‘I should get some sleep.’ He walked around more making his way to the flight deck and checked over his ship.
“Sir, can I help you?” someone asked.
“No commander, I’m alright just restless. Carry on.” He said then walked out. Slowly he walked up to the hallway to find himself standing in front of the observation door. Waving his hand the door open and he saw her standing there looking out in to space.
“Hmm,” she said.
“We should be home soon unless our son gets into something else.” He tried to make her laugh. She continued to look out the window not saying a word. “It will be good to be home again.” He tried to making idle chit chat. “Alex can’t wait until he goes back to school. I’m sure it’s more about Annie then anything. Of course DJ just wants to get behind a ship. He’s not to thrill to hit the books. Miku is going,”
“Not another word about her!” she snapped. “Right now YOU have no right to talk about my daughter!”
“Whoa wait one minute, she’s my daughter too.” he tried to keep calm. “I was only trying to make conversation. I wanted to say Miku is excited to go home and play in our back yard.” Turning Nova headed towards the door. “Nova, please wait. It’s been almost a week since I’ve even seen you and talked. I just wanted to talk that’s all. I don’t want to fight with you. I stayed away because I didn’t want to fight with you. Please can we just talk?
“What do you want to talk about?” she asked sarcastically.
“Um, anything.” He said pulling on his collar. “I was hoping to talk about what happen before getting home.”
“I don’t want to talk about that.”
Taking a deep breath he grabbed her by the arm, “Nova you know better than I that we can’t move on if we don’t talk about it. If I could I would change the past, but I can’t. I’ve made it clear that I will never return back to Zazba. Even if she requests EDF it’s one thing I will refuse. That’s one thing that I can never do again. Namir will step in for me and will be the go between. Nov?”
“Why did you name our daughter Miku?” she uttered her words.
“Yes Derek, why did you name her that?” she asked.
“It fit her, she reminded me of the clear beautiful sky. Open and full of possibilities. The sky is limitless like her life.”
“No Derek, her name meant the same thing to your daughter’s name. I saw the tombstone. It read, Sora, meaning the sky. Did you think by naming her that it would bring her back?” she said. “If I known that was the reason you gave her that name I would never agree to it. How dare you name her after your love child?” She said poking him in the chest.
“I would never do that. I would never try to replace her with Miku. She is OUR child. I was relieved that she didn’t make it. It would have made my life too difficult. I didn’t want to lose you.” He didn’t want to sound cruel but it was what he was feeling. “Look Nova I just want to get home still married. I can never take back what happen,”
“Do you even know how I feel knowing that she tried to replace her daughter with ours? DO YOU! She etched out your love child’s name and put Miku’s name on there. She was going to take Miku from us and start elsewhere. Our daughter, Derek!” She yelled and then leaned on the wall and cried into her hands. He stood quiet in front of her feeling her pain. What more could he say. He moved closer to her and slowly wrapped his arms around her. Pulling her closer he held her tight letting her cry on his shoulder. She cried hard in his arms and then hit him in the chest. “I hate you. You’ve done nothing but hurt me and to think we almost lost Miku and, oh my god, we almost lost DJ and Alex because of that crazy bitch. How can we ever get past this.” She said pounding at his chest.
“Maybe taking you back was a mistake. I should have agreed to marry Michael. At least I know he would have never hurt me.” She said with bile. “I would have been happy. I wouldn’t have to worry about someone stealing my children from me. My kids would have been safe with him. They would have had a normal life.”
It stung to hear her say that but she was angry and he knew she didn’t mean it. She just wanted to hurt him like he hurt her. “I love you Nov, if I could I would stop you from hurting. I’d take all the pain away. I’m so sorry.” He said as she cried. He didn’t know how long they stood there. The lights began to dim as the ship went to sleep mode and now ran on a skeleton crew. He kissed the top of her head and took in her scent. “Come on I’ll walk you to your room.” He said as he moved her towards the door. Silently they made their way back only hearing the humming of the ships engine. He opened her room door and walked in. He peeked in to see their daughter and smiled to himself. She will never know how close she came to disappearing from them forever. He pushed her hair from her face and kissed her forehead. “I love you Miku.” He said softly. Turning to his wife he wanted so much to kiss her. “Good night Nova. I hope to see you in the morning at breakfast or maybe at dinner?” He reached to hold her hand but she pulled away. Looking down he sensed that she was still mad. “Goodnight,” he said and walked out the door to his own quarters.
18th of January, 2225
EDF Battleship Argo
“Dad!” Mark screamed out as they turned to see him walk towards them for dinner. He gently kissed Miku on the head and she squealed in delight while he tried kissing Nova on the cheek. Sitting at the other end of the table he ruffled Mark and DJ hair and said hello to Alex.
“How are you all tonight?” he asked and looked across the table at his wife. “I finally got some time off to have dinner with you all. So Alex, how did you like working with Captain Lee?”
“It was great, dad. He is so cool. He showed me how to look over reports and the lingo in the abbreviations.”
“DJ, I see you managed to stay out of trouble today. Or is there something I should know?”
“No Dad I was on my best behavior today. So can I take her out tomorrow?”
Wildstar looked at his son and smiled. “We will see, alright? Mark how is the project going?” he asked his other twin son.
“Great Dad! I should be completed by the time we get home. I just have to ask grandpa some more questions about financing and I’m done.”
“That’s great son.” He looked over to his wife and sighed. “How is my baby girl?” he asked his daughter.
“She’s fine.”Nova was short with him making him look away for a minute. “Isn’t that right Miku.” She cooed at her daughter.
“Any nightmares?” he asked his wife.
“No, thank god. Maybe if daddy would have kept it in his pants we wouldn’t have gone through any of this.” She sang.
“Excuse me?” Wildstar asked in shock to her remark.
“You heard me.”
“Nov, I don’t think this is the time or the place.” He said with a stern voice and looked over to Mark and DJ. “Alex, I’m going to need you on the bridge tomorrow so get to bed early tonight, alright.”
“Yes sir. Will I be on raider or navigation?”
“I figure navigation in the morning, than switch you over to communication for a few.”
“Really! Thanks Dad.”
“I want you to learn everything about her before getting back to earth. DJ you will have to start learning how to work on the bridge. You’ve had enough practice on the Cosmo Zero with or without my permission.” He reached over to ruffle his son’s hair and flinch from the pain he still felt from his broken rib.
DJ turned to his father and looked serious, “Dad, what happen when they took you away from us?”
“DJ, it wasn’t fun but I thought of you, Mark, Alex and Miku all the time. It was a short time but it felt like a life time not being with all of you. Especially your mother, I missed her the most.” He told his son as he looked over to wife.
Curious DJ asked about his other sister, “Dad what happen with our other sister?”
Nova stood up and slammed her hands on the table scaring them all. “I will not talk about your half breed sister and that woman!”
“NOVA!” Derek snapped back. “Calm down we can talk about this later. It’s getting late. Finish your dinner guys.” He said looking around the mess hall as others turned to face them. “We have a big day tomorrow.” They sat there eating quietly. Nova stared away from him and focused her time with Miku. Alex shifted in his seat trying to finish his dinner. Mark and DJ just looked at their meal poking at it hoping that they can leave soon. Miku laughed at her mother as she made funny face to keep from looking in his direction. Wildstar looked to his family and wonder how this became such a mess. His wife hated him, their kids walked on egg shells around them and sometimes he felt like his crew looked at him differently. He sat back in his chair and watched her closer and could tell that she was furious at him. She looked up and saw him staring at her. With slit eyes she stared back and then continued to focus on Miku. “Looks like the kids are done. Alex help your mother with your sister, Mark, DJ clear the table. I want you two to finish any homework that was sent to you guys. I’ll check it in the morning. Let’s go. Nova I need to talk with you.” He commanded his sons and his wife.
“About what? How much of a wonderful lover you are to her? Or maybe how you swept in and saved our daughter from the crazy woman.” She said with vile from her mouth. “I am not in the mood to hear about it or her anymore. I just want to be with my daughter and sons.”
He grabbed her arm and lean in speaking to her through grit teeth softly so no one could hear. “About this! Not another word in front of the kids.” He pulled her away from the table fuming to her remarks. They walked back to his quarters as Alex followed suit. He threw opened his door and turned to his son and said. “Alex can you please take Miku to her room. Your mother and I would like to talk.”
“She stays here with me. I am not letting her out of my sight again.” Nova snapped at him. She took hold of her daughter and held her on her hip. “Alex you can go and make sure that Mark and DJ finish their work for school. I’ll be there later.”
Feeling his temper reach its point he walked over to his wife and took hold of his daughter. “We need to talk and right now is not the time to have Miku present for this.” He handed his daughter to his son and said. “Take her to the room.” Nova reached for her and he stood between them. “We have to talk.” He said through grit teeth. “Alex go.” Alex took his sister knowing this was going to be a big fight and his father didn’t want to expose her to it. Wildstar watched as the door close and sat down on the bed. “Nova we have to talk about this. Now Miku is back safe and sound. She is happy and is doing fine. I know you don’t want her out of your sight but it’s over and you have to let your guard down. Your tense and she is aware of it. We want her transition from her ordeal to go smoothly. You are making it hard on her. So please relax, it’s alright to leave her alone with her brothers or on the bridge with me.”
“I left her alone once and look what happen. I’m only grateful that she didn’t hurt our child.”
“She would have never hurt her, Nov.”
“And you know this HOW?!”
“I just know. She is not a monster. She was only a woman that lost her way after the death of child. You should show her a little compassion.”
“Are you kidding me? Seriously!? She took my child, OUR CHILD! With the intentions of us never seeing her again and all your worried about is HER! Forgive me if I don’t give a shit about her feelings or YOURS!”
“I understand how you feel, I was just as upset. But now we just have to let it go. By saying hateful things in front of our kids about her or me is not good at all and I won’t stand for it. You have to let it go for now. Hate me if you want but I will not have you say bad things about me or her in front of them.”
“I think I have tip toe around the subject long enough. I will not hold back anything anymore. I have been the faithful wife, the understanding wife, the quiet wife and lord knows what else. But I will not be that anymore. I almost lost my daughter because of you and her. So forgive me if whatever comes out of my mouth about you and her are hurtful and true.”
“Nova, for the sake of our daughter and US we have to move on.” He pleaded one last time. “Please Nova, she’s back and safe now. So let’s just move on.”
“And the next time something like this happens can we move on from that!” she snapped.
Rolling his eyes he stood up and took in a long sigh. “I can’t do this anymore, Nov. I have tried over and over to make things right with you. I love you so much but I can’t do this anymore.”
“It’s your fault! If you,”
“ENOUGH! If we keep going down this path then we will never
move ahead!” he screamed. “You know I thought when we got back together that we
put all this blaming shit behind us. You haven’t been so innocent in all this.
You too had an affair. At one
“I told you and him that I didn’t tell either of you because I wasn’t sure. It wouldn’t have been fair for either of you to put time and then be disappointed in the end. Not to mention the fact that you would have been fighting over who Miku’s father was. Anyway you could’ve told me the name of your child with her! Sora! Really Derek, SORA! You should have named our daughter practically the same name. It’s amazing how I am finding out about your life with her now.” She poked at his chest. “She had our daughter or do you not CARE!” She raised her hand to slap him and he caught her hand in mid swing.
“No! Not this time. I will not take full blame for this. Not anymore!” He screamed at her and pushed her down on to the bed. “I love you! I will always love you.” He walked across the room and said. “I just can’t do this anymore Nova. I thought that once we got back together that we would have moved on from this. That you finally forgave me but I see that you haven’t. We promised that we would never go down this path again. That you and I could start our lives over, but I guess you haven’t fully forgivien me. I am sorry Nova. I wish this never happened and that we were home in our house making love and living a happy life. I can’t do anything more then try to move on with or without you. So when you’re ready to live as husband and wife and move past this part of our lives then let me know. I promise I won’t bother you anymore. I will only speak to you about the kids. Now just leave me alone.” He said with a sigh. She stood up and fixed her uniform walking towards the door. Looking over her shoulder she saw him facing the window and looking out. “I love you.” She heard him say before she closed the door.
She walked down to her room and thought about what he said. Forget him if he loved me he would have told me about her maybe we could have past all this. But he never told me more then he wanted for me to know. She opened the door to her room and tried to smile for her children. She took hold of her daughter and held her tight. “I’m never letting you out of my sight again.”
“Mommy where is Daddy?” she asked her mother.
“He’s sleeping but told me to give you a big hug and kiss. Now we should let your brothers get some rest and we need to get some too.” She looked up to her sons and smiled. “Get to bed and get some rest. It’s been a long day. Miku come on.” She gave them all a kiss and left to her room with Miku.
“What do you think happened, Alex?” Mark asked.
“I don’t know. But she is sure putting up a front for us. Go to bed you two. I need to see about something.” Alex ordered his brothers.
“Alex I want to go too.” DJ said.
“Not this time, Deej. Just go to bed. I’ll be back soon.” Alex said then closed the door. He stood outside his father’s door and wondered whether or not to talk with him. Screw it! He thought and knocked on his door. He waited until he heard his father’s voice to enter. “Dad?”
“Hey Alex. What’s up?” he said as he took off his shirt getting ready for bed.
“Is everything alright? Mom seemed like she was trying too hard.”
He is too much like her at times. “How do you figure that, Alex?”
“She just seemed like she was smiling to keep us happy.” He said as he leaned on the wall playing with a spot on it.
Sitting down on the edge of his bed he replied. “We are fine Alex. We just need a little time apart for now. It’s been a long day and now that Miku is back she probably being very protective. Don’t worry Al, we will be fine by the time we get back to Earth.” Getting up he pat his son on the back and moved him towards the door. “Get some rest. I’ll see you in the morning on the bridge. Good night son,” then pushed him out the door. He fell on his bed and looked up to the ceiling. A tear ran down his face knowing what he told his wife. But he had to finally get her to listen to him even if it meant splitting up for a while.
2nd of February, 2225
Avoiding his wife wasn’t easy for him. He kept busy working to keep from seeing her. He missed her very much but he was as stubborn as she was when it came to their fight. He was tired of putting all the effort in and not receiving anything in return. For once he wanted her to come to him. She never said another word to him and never let their daughter out of her site. He would pass her in the corridor saying nothing more to her. He was still feeling the anger from their fight. Wildstar made sure to be there at night to tuck in his daughter to bed and quickly left not saying more to his wife. She felt his silent anger but didn’t care. If it wasn’t for him that woman would have never taken Miku. And to think he name their daughter close to what her daughter’s name meant. It was slap in the face whether he thought so or not. But she missed him. She missed talking with him. She watched as he looked away when they walked by each other in the corridor. Their tension could be cut with a sharp knife. He would stop once and a while when Miku was with her but never looked directly at his wife. But he always made time for Miku and the boys. Dinner was always with Nova. He sat with them a few times but never exchanged words with her. He simply talked with his sons and made Miku laugh. Alex would catch him look at his wife when she wasn’t looking and could see the anger and pain in his eyes. His mother would look at him too when he wasn’t looking and could see that she wanted to say something to him but stopped herself. If his father wouldn’t say anything then maybe his mother would. He made it a note to talk with her once dinner was over.
His father excused himself from the table and quickly gave Miku a kiss on the head. He left without saying more to them. Alex moved closer to his mother and asked. “Mom is everything alright with you and Dad?”
“We’re fine, Alex. Your father is just busy with work.”
“That’s not what I’m talking about. You and he haven’t talked since that night and don’t tell me you have because you haven’t. I’m not stupid mom and you may think it’s none of my business but it’s starting to affect Deej and Mark. They think once we get back to Earth that you and Dad are getting a divorce. Tell me your not, or are you?”
“Then why aren’t you two speaking to one another? Since then I haven’t heard a peep from you or him to each other. It’s not like you two. Even with us you two always manage to put your differences aside. Mom we are really worried about you and Dad.”
“I’m sorry Alexander. But this has nothing to do with you guys. Well it’s just that well,”
“Mom, stop treating me like a child. I know it all has to do with her and Dad. You seem to have swept it under the rug and hope that no one lifts the rug. I know about you two going to a shrink and I know that Dad did it for you. Maybe when we get back you and he can go back again? I mean if you’re not getting a divorce then you should see someone that is in the middle and not take sides.”
“Alex, I am not treating you like a child this is between your father and me. And I didn’t know that he told you about that. Anyway it’s your father’s idea to keep our distance until we figure out what we want. What I want or he wants.”
“Mom did you ever think that shoving his past down his throat would eventually get him sick and tired of it all.” Nova looked at him shocked. “He never brought up you and Uncle Michael. Well at least I’ve never heard him say it in front of us. And you making that sly remark about ‘our half sister with that woman’ wasn’t the best remark in front of them.” He pointed to his brothers and sister. “I know that he hurt you but I always thought when you and he got remarried that you forgave him.”
“This is different Alexander. She took Miku because of his past.”
“Okay so it played out different then what you and dad wanted. But suppose it was Uncle Michael that lost it and he tried to take Miku from us. Suppose Dad wasn’t Miku father and Uncle Michael was. How do you think that would have played out? I don’t think Dad would ever resent you for having someone else’s child.”
She couldn’t believe how grown up he was. “When did you get so wise?” she smiled at him.
“You know that after Dad leaves the bridge he goes straight to bed. Especially tonight, he said something about being really beat from working on his fighter with Uncle Tony. Not to mention keeping DJ out of trouble.” She gave him a smile knowing that he was trying to get her to go see him. “I can watch Miku tonight if you want to, oh I don’t know, take a walk.” He said looking at his baby sister.
“Thanks Alex but I don’t think I’ll be needing a baby sitter tonight. I really don’t feel comfortable leaving her alone for a while.” She stood up and grabbed her daughter.”Alright Miss Miku it’s getting late and it’s time you get to bed. Come on. Boys make sure that all your assignments are done. I don’t want to return to Earth and find out at the last minute there were a few thing’s missing. I’ll be in later to check on you guys once I get Miku here to bed.”
They watched as she left the mess hall when DJ turned to his brother. “So are they going to get divorce?” he asked Alex.
“I told you no. Now stop asking. If they were they would have already told us, now you heard Mom let’s go and get ready for bed.” He ordered his brothers.
Nova smiled at her daughter and tucked her in tight. “Isn’t daddy coming to say goodnight?” she asked her mother.
“He will once he is finished on the bridge. Even if you fall asleep he will come and kiss you while you dream. Remember what he told, he kisses you to keep the bad dreams away.” She softly said to her daughter. “Now close your eyes. I love you.” She told her. She watched as she drifted off to sleep and then sat on her bed trying to read a book. She was reading the words but nothing made sense to her, her mind kept drifting back to what her son said. Were they both right was she still resenting the past? Was she holding this over his head every chance she got? They both went to therapy and did hash out a lot of what happened. But did she really forgive him for his mistakes or did her heart take over her mind and accepted it for just the moment. If she didn’t forgive him why did she remarry him? I do love him. He has been good to me. He’s never did anything to literally hurt me. She looked over to her daughter and smiled. And he’s given me 4 great kids. He’s right I wasn’t innocent in all this. I did make a mistake also. Even if I did think he abandoned me I had no right to sleep with Michael. I should have stopped it. If I did I wouldn’t feel so guilty and I wouldn’t be shoving his mistakes in his face. Damn you Alex! She threw the book across the bed and got up. She gently kissed her daughter on her sleeping head and walked out the door. She went to her son’s room and gently woke up her oldest son. “Alex I need you to stay with Miku for a few. I need to go for a walk.” She softly said. She walked to his room and stood there looking at the door. What am I going to say? Her hand shook as she raised it to knock on his door. She could hear a muffle from the other side and hesitated. Oh screw it! She thought then knocked on his door. He didn’t reply at first and she turned to go. Then she heard him yell. ENTER! She froze where she stood and she heard him yell again. “I SAID ENTER!” she could hear his voice grow angry and annoyed.
“WHO IS IT! God damit! If you’re going to knock on the door this late at night at least say some,” he whipped opened the door and saw her standing there. “Oh, I didn’t know it was you. Sorry for yelling. Is everything alright with the kids?”
“Umm, yeah, they’re fine. I’m sorry I shouldn’t have disturb you. I should go. Sorry.” She turned to walk down to her room.
He grabbed at her arm and turned her to him. “Whoa wait a minute, hold on. Come in.” He led her into the room and motioned her to sit on the bed. “Sorry Sandor, I need to go. There is someone that wants to talk.” He closed his computer and then took his desk chair and placed it in front of her. “How are you?” he started.
“Okay I guess.” She said back.
“How is Miku any nightmares?” he tried making small talk.
“She’s sleeping well, which reminds me, I really should go back to my room.” She began to get up.
“Wait, don’t go. Sit with me. Tell me about what’s been going on. It’s been a while since we spoke.”
“Well you know about DJ and Mark has been working hard on his science project. Alex has been a great help with Miku and,”
He put his hand on her leg and looked deep into her eyes. “Nova, why did you really come here?”
She took a deep breath and looked away from him. “I wanted to tell you that I’m sorry. I should have never let things go this far. You were right about me not letting things go. I guess I was taking my mistakes out on you. Derek I’m so sorry. I never meant to make you look bad in front of the kids. I was so upset and I needed to lash out on someone. You’re a great Dad and husband. You’ve been nothing but good to me and I made you feel like crap over what happened. It wasn’t your fault that she took Miku. But when I saw your daughter’s head stone and saw the name it just rocked me to the core. I only wished that you had told me more about her.”
“I promise that I will never use it against you again. I will have to work it out but to make you happy and make our marriage work I will get help in dealing with my feelings.” She told him.
He smiled at her and kissed her nose. “I only wish that I could change everything. I would do anything for you, you know that. And if you need me to go with you I am at your disposal. Thank you baby, I was hoping that we would straighten this out before we got to Earth.”
“Derek, would you have moved out if we didn’t?”
“Of course not. It would have been a little uncomfortable but eventually we would have worked it out.”
“You know our sons thought we were going to get divorced again.” She said wiping a tear from her eye.
“Well I haven’t been the best in company lately. I was pretty pissed off at you, but I never meant to make you or the kids uncomfortable.”
“I’ve wanted to talk with you for awhile now but I guess my stubbornness took the best of me.”
“Hmm, seems we are both thick headed. Anyway it’s late, I should walk you back to your room. Did you leave Miku alone?”
“No Alex is with her.”
He smiled at her knowing it was hard to leave their daughter alone. “Come on its late.” He put on his jacket and walked her back to her room. Quietly he opened the door and smiled to see his oldest son lying next to his baby sister. He closed the door to her room and spoke softly. “Maybe it will be better if you leave him with her tonight. I don’t want to wake him.”
“Where am I going to sleep?” she asked.
He leaned closer to her pressing her body against the wall. “I have plenty of space in my room.” He said moving his finger down her face to her neck and chest. “What do you say? Would you like to bunk together for the night?”
The warmth of his body next to her made her body blush to his touch. He kissed her neck making her heart beat faster. “Admiral don’t you think that this is against regulation?”
“I believe it is but as Commander of this ship I think I can over look it.” He told her and kissed her on the lips. He felt her hand reach into his jacket and touch his chest and then moved her hand towards his back pulling him closer to her. They stood outside of both rooms in a passionate kiss when they heard someone coming up the hallway. She quickly let him go and he wiped his lips. He pull closed his jacket and smiled at her. They stood apart as one of the crew walked by. “Sir,” he said and saluted him. “Carry on Ensign.” Wildstar said returning his salute. Nova looked away blushing while he tried not to laugh. He felt like teenager stealing a kiss as her parents turned on the porch light. “Come here,” he pulled at her again and kissed her once more. “Come on before we get interrupted again.” Taking her by the hand he led her back to his room. He closed the door as he kissed her. He moved her towards the bed and took off his jacket. She gazed into his eyes as he began to undress her.
“Don’t Nova, let’s just deal with it later.”
“No I was just thinking about Miku.”
“She’s just fine. Alex won’t let anything happen to her.” He said then kissed her.
He watched her sleeping next to him and smiled that they were at least talking. For a minute there he thought that they would return to Earth still not speaking and he lied to that fact of moving out. If they weren’t still speaking once they returned he knew it would have been best to move out. He lean in and kissed her gently on the head. He threw on some pants and t-shirt and went to her room. He nudged his son awake and told him. “I’m taking Miku to your mother. Stay here and sleep.”
“Is everything alright, Dad?”
Smiling at him, “Everything is just fine.” He picked up his daughter and brought her back to his room. Lying her down next to her mother he slipped the covers over them and crawled in next to them.
12th of February, 2225
Docking station 34
EDF Battleship ARGO
Quarters of Admiral Derek Wildstar Senior
Wildstar finished typing in to his log and closed his laptop. He looked around his room one more time. His sea bag stood against the wall waiting for him to grab. The shelves on the wall were emptied. All maps were sent to the archives and his safe was empty. He looked out the window and smiled, they were finally home. He watched as his men ran to their families hugging and kissing. We made it home with no casualties. He didn’t have to call any families to inform them of their lost. Besides his family drama his men and women all came back alive. They threw a party for them the night before giving them thanks for their hard work in the search for his family and the rescue of his daughter and his own life. All in all it was a good mission he thought. He walked to his head and began to clean out his things when he heard the knock on the door. “ENTER” he yelled out.
“Yes,” he poked his head out of the head and saw Sandor standing there. “Stephen! God it’s good to see you.”
“Welcome home Wildstar.”
“Thanks how are Yvey and Dee?”
“They’re great. They’re down stairs talking with Nova and the kids. How are you, everything alright?”
“Yeah everything is fine, why?”
“Well considering you being captured and Miku being kidnapped I would think this would be one of your hardest floats. So, everything alright?”
Taking a deep breath he ran his hand through his thick hair, “We are doing well. It’s going to take a few to get back to where we were at, but it will work out. Is there something I should know? Has this become another court matter? Should I be worried?”
He smirked at his friend, “Naw, Captain Lee informed me about everything before it hit the council. Anyway with Dash and Homer on the board I don’t think we will have any more problems. I’m just concern about you and Nova.”
“Well to tell you the truth at one point I thought we would be coming back divorced. It just seemed hopeless. But we had a great life coach.”
“Alex, he was great at hashing things out and making us see the lining in the sky. It’s amazing as too how grown up our kids have become. It makes me feel old.” He hunched over trying to act old.
Laughing with him he knew all too well what he was talking about. “Tell me about it, it seems when Yvey and I fight Dee is the one to make us sit down and talk things out. Not that I am able to say anything. She never wants to lose in anything. Dee tells me that it’s best to just give in to her demands. Which reminds me, before I forget and she gives me all hell about it later. Valentine’s Day is a few days away and there’s going to be a big shing ding at the officers club. Yvey wants for you guys to join us.”
“Thanks Stephen I’m sure Nova would love to go. It will give us some time together alone without the kids. I’m almost done here just give me a minute.” He finished up packing while Sandor filled him on what has been going on back on Earth. He placed his laptop into his brief case and then took one last look around the room. He shut off the lights and made his way down to the gangway. Nova waited at the bottom while Misha waited in the car with the kids. His smiled widen as he walked down to meet her. Taking her in his arms he said. “Welcome home Mrs. Wildstar. I am so glad to make it back home with you still as my wife. I love you so much.”
She smiled back and said, “Me too. I love you so much Admiral. Let’s go home.”
Looking from the car their sons watch on to see how happy they looked at that moment. Alex smiled to himself and thought how lucky to have them as his parents. “Hey Alex, is that how you’re going to kiss Annnnnie?” DJ joked. Then blew him a kiss.
“Grow up will ya,” he told his brother. “Or you won’t make it to see your eleventh birthday.”
“Wow is that all you got?”
Placing his face in front of his brother’s he smiled and said. “I’ve already taken out one person, you want to be the next?” making his brother swallow. “I thought so. Now shut up and sit there and don’t think about telling Annie anything. If she’s going to hear anything it’s going to come from me.” Back to reality of a boring life with his brothers and sister he thought. But I wouldn’t change it for the world.
Thanks for reading . . . . .
My next tale begins with their return back to Earth. When their daughter has a nightmare of what happened Nova seeks help to deal with her emotions to her marriage. Derek must now reveal everything to Nova and a certain person returns back into their lives.
Next Tale ---- Letter’s of Regret